I have already had a drug test so it can be noted that no other substance is affecting the study. I also completed a detailed questionnaire. My condition, it can’t really be put into words, is documented here. Whatever happens now will result in more questionnaires. Possibly, I will change. Possibly the days will no longer be so colorless and dark. But that is a pipe dream.

Today I’m taking the first of four appointments. As part of the study, I will be administered a placebo twice and the “true drug” twice. When I receive what, neither my companion nor I know. Every time I will be supported by my travel companion Markus. He’s a doctor with advanced training in this area. He will keep an eye on my physical condition on the one hand and on the other hand he will make sure that the setting is right.

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